SWF Seeks RLLTR*

*Readers Looking for Long Term Relationship

You’ve already heard about my struggles with editing, but today I’m going to share another stumbling block on my road to self-publishing: the book blurb.

The blurb, the dustcover, the back of the book description – Whatever you call it, the blurb is very important. It’s your frontline marketing tool. It has to grab the reader’s attention, set your book apart from the hundreds (thousands?) of others, and entice the reader to give your book a try.

I’ve written a book (heck, I’ve actually already written four books). You’d think I could handle writing a short description of it. Afterall, I’ve lived and breathed the story for months. But I’m here to tell you it’s HARD! How do you take your 50,000+ words and condense them into less than three hundred while making it sound exciting and interesting?

ladies-in-little-black-dressesThe more I think about it, the more I realize that the blurb is like an online dating profile. You may have got everyone’s attention with that sexy, little black dress (the book cover) but the blurb is your chance to show them that there is some substance there too.

Just like a dating profile should honestly portray your personality, your blurb should reflect the writing style of your book. Don’t make it sound like a comedy when it’s actually dark drama. Like the cover itself, your blurb is a promise to the reader. It makes a statement about what they can expect to find inside. Don’t break your promise or you’ll find yourself without readers (or dates).

Your blurb is your perfect pick up line. Clever and engaging and certainly not cliché. It should be tailored to the audience you want to date, er…I mean attract. If you say you like hunting and fishing in your dating profile, don’t complain when you find yourself stuck on a boat for six hours using live worms for bait. The same goes with your blurb. Don’t dress a romance up like a psychological thriller and then wonder why everyone is slamming your book for not delivering as promised in their reviews.

Above all – and I don’t mean to sound like your Mom, but hey, mothers usually have good advice – don’t give it all away on the first date. Leave them wanting more. You’re writing a blurb, not a synopsis. You don’t want to summarize the entire story or drop any spoilers. You want to tantalize the reader, not give the game away. The blurb should be short and sweet. Your reader will probably only glance quickly at the back cover or their eyes might simply skim over the online description. In those few seconds you need to whet their apetite so they want to buy your book. You know how the old saying goes. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free!

To help you craft the perfect blurb, here are a couple of links that I found helpful:

The Do’s and Don’ts of Writing a Blurb for your Novel
4 Easy Steps to an Irresistible Book Blurb

So how did I do with my blurb?  Did I pique your interest?  Did I leave you wanting more?  I’d love to hear from you.

This really has nothing to do with book blurb, but I thought it was funny. If you have ever tried online dating, I'm sure you'll get it.

This really has nothing to do with writing a book blurb, but I thought it was funny. If you have ever tried online dating, I’m sure you’ll get it.

What’s wrong with getting an eBook for nothing?

A rant for Monday. I totally agree. I will not undersell the value of my hard work. When authors give away their work for free or sell it for next to nothing, it hurts the independent publishing community as a whole by perpetuating the idea that indies are worth less.

Jack Eason's avatarHave We Had Help?

Free Books.001

Everything, that’s what!!!

The fact that today’s readers of eBooks demand it must be free or on offer as part of an all you can read for x number of dollars per month package deal, is just so wrong!

Face it people, when you go to your supermarket to get your groceries, or to any other retail outlet you care to name, do you get what you want for nothing? No of course not. So why should you expect to get a book for free? I’ve heard some people claim it should be free because an eBook isn’t a real book, only an electronic file. Good grief morons, try engaging your brains for once in your lives! These same idiots argue that they should be able to download their favourite music for free as well. I have just two words on that subject – Taylor Swift!!!

Thanks to Amazon belabouring…

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Fun Friday

Two German guys drinking Helium beer and they sound like minions.  ‘Nuff said.  Enjoy!

Unfortunately, after I watched the video, I discovered it was an April Fool’s Joke.  Too bad.  Can you imagine the fortune they would make selling the stuff at keggers?

Tuesday Teaser

Dead and Kicking, the first instalment of The Harry Russo Diaries is coming out on October 2!  The countdown begins.  Pre-orders will be available starting at the end of the month.

Just a short one today….

chapter_scroll - for pdf

“Now that wasn’t so bad, was it?  Surely not as frightening as meeting the Magister.”

I looked at Eleanor, remembering the wave of power I felt from her earlier, and replied, “I think you can be just as scary as the Magister when you want to.”

“Yes, of course dear.  It’s nice to know your grandmother didn’t raise a fool.”

Dead and Kicking, by Lisa Emme

Things That Make Me Go Hmmmm

Dog-Days-of-Summer-Logo-web

I’ve just come off a week’s vacation. The first weekend was almost unbearably hot and humid, and not once but twice, I overheard someone mention the ‘dog days of summer’.

Hmmmm….So why do we call the hot, sometimes dry-sometimes sticky July/August weather ‘dog days’?

The expression dog days of summer refers to the sultry days of the northern hemisphere summer that coincide with heliacal rising of the constellation Sirius. This constellation, also known as Orion’s Dog or the Dog Star, is the brightest star in the night sky. It can be seen almost everywhere on the Earth’s horizon and at this time of year, in the Northern Hemisphere, it rises in conjunction with the sun.

 sirius constellation

The ancient Greeks observed that the appearance of Sirius heralded the hot and dry summer, and feared that it caused plants to wilt, men to weaken, and women to become aroused (woo hoo!). The Romans knew these days as dies caniculares, and the star Sirius was called Canicula, “little dog.” Homer even referenced Sirius in the Iliad when describing the approach of Achilles toward Troy, associating it with oncoming heat, fevers and evil:

Sirius rises late in the dark, liquid sky
On summer nights, star of stars,
Orion’s Dog they call it, brightest
Of all, but an evil portent, bringing heat
And fevers to suffering humanity.

Because Sirius is so bright and rises and sets with the sun at this time of year, the Ancient Greeks and Romans believed that its heat added to the heat of the sun, creating a stretch of hot and sultry weather. They named this period of time, from 20 days before the conjunction to 20 days after, “dog days” after the dog star.

Today, the dog days of summer occur during the period between July 3 and August 11. Although it is certainly the warmest period of the summer, the heat is not due to the added radiation from a far-away star, regardless of its brightness. The heat of summer is a direct result of the earth’s tilt.

Traditional Publishing – Why I’m Not Going There

There was a time when I thought I needed to be published traditionally.  That I would only feel that I had ‘made it’ as an author if my book was published by a mainstream publisher.  I thought I needed that validation.

These days, I feel like I should write a thank you letter to the publisher that sent me my very first (and only) rejection letter.  I was totally expecting it.  I knew that I would have to ‘pay my dues’ before getting that elusive book contract, but the more I researched and read on the topic of getting published, the more ridiculous it all seemed.  The submission process of most of the traditional publishers is a writer’s nightmare.  That’s if you can even find one that is accepting unsolicited manuscripts (i.e. submitted directly rather than through an agent).   And for what?  If you do happen to get an offer, the pittance you will earn in royalties is an insult to all your hard work.

 

Pressure

I don’t need a traditional publisher to give me validation.  I’m going to let my books speak for themselves (although that doesn’t mean I won’t be busy trying to learn everything I can about marketing them) and the only validation I need will come from my readers.

If you are on the fence about whether you should self-publish, this article  by guest writer Ann Voss Peterson on JA Konrath’s blog may just help you to jump down on the side of indies.

Tuesday Teaser

Here’s another little glimpse into what awaits you in Harry’s world….

 

“Are those…?”  Tess’s voice trailed off in disbelief.

“Zombies.”  I shook my head.  It couldn’t be true, but it was.  They were in various stages of decomposition, their skin ashen grey, their clothes torn and tattered.  They moved mindlessly, following the single imperative of the one who called them from the grave, scratching and clawing at anything in their way….

Dead and Kicking by Lisa Emme